South Park

Carpet Licker

Season 1 • 12/02/1998

The boys try to turn into lesbians.

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00:28

No More Pie
South ParkS1

Just when Damien starts being accepted, he has to leave South Park. Cartman gets his just desserts.
05/02/1998
02:03

Hot For Teacher
South ParkS1

The class gets a substitute teacher.
12/02/1998
01:49

Not Acting Like A Freak
South ParkS1

After Wendy freaks out on Stan, the boys talk to Chef about his date with Ms. Ellen. He tells them that she is a lesbian.
12/02/1998
01:47

Criminal Iraqi Fugitive
South ParkS1

Wendy and Stan patch things up and Mr. Garrison can't take being so unbelievably hot anymore.
12/02/1998
01:01

Hasselhoff
South ParkS1

Mr. Garrison is getting a nose job from a surgeon named Tom.
12/02/1998
00:44

Don't F#$* With Me
South ParkS1

After class, Wendy approaches Ms. Ellen about Stan. She threatens the teacher to stay away from her man.
12/02/1998
01:58

Stan Vomits For Someone Else
South ParkS1

The boys talk to Chef about how in love with Ms. Ellen they are. Wendy is jealous and she reminisces about the days when Stan would puke for her.
12/02/1998
02:01

No Substitute For You
South ParkS1

In class, the boys all compete for the attention of Ms. Ellen. Chef comes in and hits on her, using his singing skills to ask her out.
12/02/1998
00:53

Contact
South ParkS1

Mr. Garrison wakes up from the surgery. He is in bad shape -- his face is bleeding, his head is spinning and he keeps vomiting at the mention of the film "Contact."
12/02/1998
01:05

Presents
South ParkS1

The class gives Valentine's Day gifts to Ms. Ellen. The gifts are very thoughtful.
12/02/1998
00:43

Carpet Licker
South ParkS1

Mr. Garrison takes off the bandages and looks exactly like David Hasselhoff. Meanwhile, the boys try their hardest to become lesbians.
12/02/1998
02:04

Black Leather
South ParkS1

Wendy's makeover is no match for Ms. Ellen's new look. Mr. Garrison resigns and Stan gets the highest test score, winning him a dinner with Ms. Ellen.
12/02/1998
00:58

Gonna Need More Smack
South ParkS1

Wendy is crushed when she spies on Stan and Ms. Ellen having dinner. Mr. Garrison pursues a heroin-addicted new career.
12/02/1998
01:11

Lost Love
South ParkS1

Wendy apologizes to Ms. Ellen and the class. She has given up on the fight for Stan and is torn up. Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison is on fire.
12/02/1998
01:14

Into the Sun
South ParkS1

Wendy throws a party where it is revealed that she called the Iraqis on Ms. Ellen. She gets her wish, and Ms. Ellen is shot into the center of the sun.
12/02/1998
02:02

Rochambeau
South ParkS1

The boys are on a school field trip digging up ancient arrowheads when Cartman finds a strange, magic triangle that must be thousands of years old.
19/02/1998
02:49

Barbra Who?
South ParkS1

Cartman's not speaking to Kyle, Leonard Maltin is looking for Barbra Streisand, and Babs wants that magic triangle.
19/02/1998
04:27

Disintegration Rules
South ParkS1

The National Guards' firepower has no effect on Barbra, neither does Maltin or Poitier. But Robert Smith's Robot Punch to the nose renders her powerless.
19/02/1998
01:12

Zinthar at Hand
South ParkS1

Leonard Maltin and Chef are trying to find the boys before Barbra does. Streisand is getting crazy over the triangles.
19/02/1998
01:13

It Doesn't Sound Good
South ParkS1

Leonard tries to explain the history behind Babs' curious insanity. If she finds the half of the triangle the boys have she'll become the most threatening thing known to man.
19/02/1998
01:38

Meet Mrs. Jones
South ParkS1

Babs shows up disguised as a nice lady to trick the boys into coming to her mountain condo so she can kill them...er...pay them for the magic triangle.
19/02/1998