Editing Cherokee Hair Tampons (section)

==Story==

===Description===
Kyle is deathly ill and needs a new kidney. His mother insists upon treating his condition using New Age medicine, which she learns about at a new holistic healing shop run by a woman named,  Miss Information. Miss Information gets many of her products from two "Native American" men named Carlos Ramirez and Chief Running Pinto (played by Cheech and Chong). Their offerings include the episode's namesake, Cherokee Hair Tampons.

Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison (thanks to his escapades in "Cartman Joins  NAMBLA") has lost his teaching job. He decides to try his hand at writing a romance novel, but an editor at  Harequin states that it's a bit too "gay" for his mostly female audience, since it includes 6,083 references to penises.

Cartman, it turns out, is the town's only viable kidney donor for Kyle, but he refuses to give one unless he gets $10 million. Undaunted, Stan tries to cut a kidney  out of Cartman while he sleeps, but is thwarted by a protective device he wears called a Kidney Blocker 2000.

Kyle gets worse, so his mother takes him to Miss Information's store for a consultation with Carlos Ramirez and Chief Running Pinto. The men, aghast at the boy's condition, tell her to take him to a hospital -- and further admit that they're Mexican rather than Native American. Kyle gets a kidney from Cartman, who is conned into surrendering one. Mr. Garrison's novel, called In The Valley of Penises, is published to great acclaim.

===What I Learned Today===
"Being in touch with the earth has nothing to do with dying, man."

===Memorable Quotes===
* "Don't get too close to Kyle. He looks like he might have the AIDS." [[Liane Cartman]]
* "Cartman, you are  SO going to Hell when you die." [[Stan]]
* "Let the wonders and the mysteries of our people, like, change the way you think about tampons." Tommy Chong
* "Women want to read about ding-dongs." [[Mr. Garrison]]
* "I just think that taking a woman home and getting some hot poon is about the greatest thing in the world."  [[Mr. Garrison]]
* "It felt good.  Like a penis.  A soft, but sturdy penis that felt warm to the touch."  An excerpt from Mr. Garrison's book
* "I hope it's not too bloody, I'm wearing my favorite pants."  [[Butters]]
* "This is what we in the book publishing business like to call Gay.  Really, REALLY gay."  Book Publisher
* "You never care when I die!!"  [[Kenny]]
* "Hippies... They're everywhere... They want to save the Earth... But all they do is smoke pot and smell bad... Hellllppp..." [[Cartman]]